Remember to always replace the lid of your slow cooker fully to avoid woodlice falling into your Orkney Beef casserole when the steam from below overcomes them. Although nutritious, their presence is an acquired taste for youngsters.
Aug 202010
Aug 192010
It’s late at night and I’m sitting on the wide window ledge in the kitchen. The light is on and the curtains are open. I’m reading. There’s the sound of pitter patter on the window – the perfect sound of large raindrops hitting the glass. It’s a romantic sound to me, speaking volumes of the [...]
Aug 192010
Emptying woodlice from your underpants before putting them on in the early morning leads to much greater comfort on the bicycle saddle by mid-morning.
Aug 182010
No, not that kind of circus. I mean Circus cyaneus, the Hen Harrier. Sitting in the window seat looking over the fields and out to sea I see a huge brown raptor flying towards Einar. It looks like a chunky owl until I see the characteristic white rump and long tail. With a wingspan of [...]
Aug 182010
Always buy a toilet seat that contrasts in colour and tone with woodlice in order to avoid sitting on them unexpectedly.
Aug 162010
I’m not someone who likes to air his dirty laundry in public. That’s why I bring you only my cleanest pants and socks. Washing by hand. Classic. One of the usual household items completely missing from Westray is the clothes peg. You may find an old fashioned wooden one in a children’s craft kit in [...]
… because it’s stone and breaks naturally into flags. The whole Island of Westray is made of it. Perfect flagstone paving everytime. It’s just a pity that there’s no naturally occurring slate on the island, because flags make very, very heavy roofing materials. Most of the old buildings have collapsed because of structural failure of [...]
When you move to an abandoned house there are always inhabitants who need to be evicted. Some are simply guests. Some are unwanted relatives and others are fierce squatters. Woodlice in the lamp shades. Spiders in the bath. Mice in the understairs cupboard. Birds in the hall. Wonderful primitive bristletails on the windowsills. In this [...]
Aug 152010
Always shake the woodlice off your flannel before using it to wipe your face in the morning.
Aug 112010
Morning. Another day on Westray and time to tip the woodlice out of my slippers, have some Scots porridge for breakfast and give my bicycle tyres a firm squeeze. All is right with the world. I’m proud of my daughter. She’s thirteen and knows the scientific name for the fruit fly. That’s good because the [...]
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